dj_dedf1sh | Heckin' Inbox (Text/Audio/In Person)

Hello, my dear. I apologize for disappearing like that, I don't plan on making a habit out of it. Thank you for keeping the station running in my absence. We should be back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow.

[ Hey boss, you're getting a call shortly after Acht hears the message. ]

[he picks up after a few rings]

Hello! Alastor speaking.

Hey, boss. It's Acht. Just got your message. Where have you been? I was getting worried about you.

[ They actually sound slightly concerned. Which means they are VERY concerned. ]

Edited Date: 2024-07-16 10:38 pm (UTC)

Worried? About me? Oh, my dear. [a chuckle] I'm just fine. Lucifer and I just had a bit of an altercation, that's all. If you'd like, we can chat a bit more in person. I still don't quite trust these machines, you see.

May as well. You wanna meet at the station, or...?

Well, seeing as I'm already there, that would be just swell.

See you soon.

[click]

[ Acht finds themself staring at their phone a moment after Alastor hangs up. Yeah, it wasn't like him to just vanish all of a sudden. And an altercation with Lucifer? Is the boss even in one piece?

It takes a little while for Acht to arrive. They had to make a quick detour to the nearest pharmacy in Heaven that sold first aid kits. Not that they were sure how it was supposed to help heal non-celophod person wounds, but just in case...

They open the door, gripping the handle of the kit in their hand. ] Hey... Boss? Sorry it took so long...

[ They're keeping their eyes out for that familiar red, grinning demon... ]

Boss?

[a familiar voice comes from Alastor's office;]

In my office, Acht~! Come in, come in.

[and there is... definitely someone sitting at the desk. But it doesn't look like Alastor, at least, not at first blush. Instead of red and black, the figure is sporting a lavender-blue and white color scheme. But the broad smile and lo-fi voice are unmistakable. He looks up from the script he's working on and adjusts the delicate golden glasses perched on his nose]

Ah, there you are. Shut the door behind you, if you would.

Edited Date: 2024-07-17 04:34 am (UTC)

[ Peering from the doorway, Acht has to pull off their shades for a moment to confirm what they're seeing. They hardly do so in public. This is probably the first time Alastor has actually seen their eyes, and they're staring at him in shock. ]

What the... Boss, is that...?

[ Who else could it be. Acht sighs, shakes their head, and closes the door behind them before putting the shades back on. ] What happened to you?

Edited Date: 2024-07-17 05:07 am (UTC)

[oh! They have beautiful eyes! So exotic and unique. They should take off their glasses more often. Once the door is closed, Alastor gestures with a hand, sealing the room with magic.

Then, with a much more serious tone;]

What I am about to tell you is for your ears only. Do you understand?

[ Yeah, but they always look sad and cutesy, so nah.

That's neither here nor there. Acht nods as they step forward, clutching the first aid kit they didn't even need. ] Mhm...

Edited Date: 2024-07-17 02:59 pm (UTC)

[Alastor tilts his head]

I will know if you don't keep this a secret. And crossing me is n̹̪̘͈̜̦õ̥t̘̹̲̤̱͇̻͛͋͐̽͛ͫ̐ ̻̫̯͈̉̔ͮ̚w̝is͚̺̿̅e̱̘͌ͤ.

[he extends his hand, a few blueish green veve dancing around it]

So I'm going to need you to make it official. Of course, you can refuse, but then you'll be in the dark.

[ Acht is understandably hesitant. There's a good reason they hardly make deals with anyone down here; the last time they tried that... Well... They don't remember much of that period, but they do remember waking up dead and empty inside. They remember it took their old friend's project to even remember who they were, and even now there's still lingering effects they've learned to deal with.

At the same time... This is Alastor. A fellow musician. The guy who got them into radio. He's creepy at times, but he's never forced them into anything... Even now he's giving an out. ]

Boss... You're really making me uneasy right now...

... But I trust you.

[ They reach out to take that hand, bracing for the worst. ]

[his grin spreads, but he shakes their hand and it's... fairly benign? Some sparks of his magic, a weird tingle, and that's all.]

You will find that if you try to tell anyone of what we speak of here today, you will be unable to. That's all. No pain, no suffering, no soul exchanges. Simple. ... Ah, it may hurt if you keep trying too much, though.

[he clears his throat and stands up, pacing a bit] Lucifer and I got into... an altercation. It doesn't matter what about -- it's a moot point now. But he slaughtered me, and then later died from the wounds I inflicted upon him. Sliced my head clean off with his blade! [he sounds... not especially upset about it??? weirdly??? he taps his claws on the desk] Now, Sinners die all the time, my dear. Murdered by each other on the regular. They come back, right as rain and good as new, in a few days. You can't have proper eternal punishment if you can just check out any time you like! But... when a Sinner is felled by an angel, or a holy weapon? There's no coming back from that. [he meets their eyes] And yet, here I am. And for a mortal soul like me to kill Lucifer? Simply unheard of.

[ He will feel their grip tighten at the tingling, but something about this deal... ] Nnh... Got it.

[ Could be a lot worse. A helluva lot worse.

But when he explains what all happened... ]

... Right. I have a couple of questions about this. [ They set the first aid kit against the wall near the door before leaning against said wall. ] First off. You're from that other Hell, right? Wouldn't that mean that place... Does respawning differently?

[ With the technology of the current century, inkfish society figured out how to ressurect people should they fall in the heat of battle. Can't save one from everything, but it's enough to turn what was a deadly style of war into a fun youth sport... Or so Acht has heard. So the idea of "coming back right as rain" doesn't faze them as much. ]

[oh, it could be SO much worse.]

Questions? I may have some answers. [some short, quiet canned laughter] How I described it is how it usually works where I'm from. If this same scenario had happened there, I would be permanently deceased, and Lucifer would recover with little incident. [he puts his finger to his mouth, looking away] I suppose I thought it would be the same here.

[ Headtilt. ] Well, clearly that's not how it works here. I wasn't sure if you could even "die" again here, but I wasn't expecting... That.

[ They gesture at the boss' current appearance. ] So, what. Does getting killed make you switch sides? Because if that's true, it's gonna be real hard for us to explain how you turned all angel-y without mentioning the whole getting killed thing.

Mmm, well. We only have two examples -- illogical to extrapolate anything useful from such a small sample size, eh? I suppose more people are going to have to die and be revitalized to prove anything, ho ho!

[he flaps a hand dismissively]

Nonsense. It can easily be chalked it up to yet another paperwork error. Honestly surprised it hasn't happened before this.

... I don't plan on being a guinea pig anytime soon.

[ They're not a great soldier. They were never cut out for that life. They would probably not last long against any of the fighters here. ]

Same... Except if the same thing happened to Lucifer, that story starts looking flimsy. [ And before he starts thinking they're a flake- ] Not trying to back out of anything, by the way. I just want to make sure we have a good cover story before folks start getting too suspicious.

Well, never say never. But playing it safe isn't a bad plan, ho ho.

Does it? I don't think so. Those sheep really are THAT incompetent. And most people have their own problems to worry about, Acht. People are wonderfully shortsighted and self-absorbed. Even you are only interested because you have a vested interest in me and your job. [he holds a hand up before they can say anything] No offense intended.

[ Opens mouth. Closes mouth. ]

None taken. [ They silently wonder if this is actually true or if Al's been burned one too many times. This isn't the best time to argue ethics, though. ]

Still, there's a chance a few people who know you might notice... Like that Emporio kid. And the new janitor guy. Maybe you happen to know a few people outside work.

[ Assuming Alastor isn't the only one from his world, which is very likely at this point. ]

What are you gonna tell them if they ask?

[probably a little of column A and a little of column B. Alastor has been around for a long time, and surrounded by the worst humanity has to offer. His viewpoint isn't much of a surprise]

I've already spoken to Emporio, you needn't worry about that. And Maurice? He's terrified of me. He won't pry. [he sits back at his desk and waves a hand] Don't worry your pretty little tentacles about it. It's nothing I can't handle. Don't you recall? For that silly little heaven mentorship program? Golden feathers were being handed out, an item capable of temporarily switching alignments. Given how silly everything is here, one of those could easily malfunction.

... Whatever you say, boss.

[ Whelp, they're holding their end of the bargain. If this gets out anyway, it's on Al. ]

Really? I managed to get out of mentor stuff by using work as an excuse, so I didn't get that part. Anything else about it I should know about?

Mmm, not to my knowledge. I got paired with Beetlejuice, of all people. So in case you were wondering if the sheep truly are that incompetent... well. Exhibit A.

Edited Date: 2024-07-23 03:49 am (UTC)

[ . . . ]

You're not talking about that grungy angel guy, are ya?

[ Hopefully the juice guy isn't gonna question this too hard. ]

[a nod] Mmmm. The same. [he didn't ever think he'd meet someone more dirty and skeevy than he and yet, here we are!]

[ On Christmas day, Acht will find a neon green parcel outside their hotel door. ]

[ Inside the box is a pair of fuzzy striped socks, a bag of fancy coffee, and a bottle of elevation gummies. ]

[ Oh, hey. This is actually pretty neat!

... Except the gummies, probably. Hey, are there special instructions on this bottle? They can't tell if this is poison or fizzy lifting drink or what. ]

Left on Acht's turntables at the station around Christmas is a package wrapped nicely in plain brown paper with an ornate bow made of red ribbon. Inside is a set of vintage style headphones that, despite looking ancient, have excellent sound fidelity and are fairly comfortable! There's also a little red cloth bag tied with a piece of twine and sealed with wax. It has a unique smell, like charcoal, herbs, lavender, and a hint of something sweetly rotten.

There's a vintage-style christmas card with a handwritten note inside -- "Keep up the good work, my dear :) Carry this little gris-gris with you, and the demons in Hell shouldn't give you quite so much trouble. Don't open it though!! Merry Christmas! - ALASTOR"

[ Oh? Looks like Al got the same gift sending idea Acht had and beat them to it.

Shortly after they've had a chance to break for commercials, Acht starts roaming the studio looking for Alastor, brand new headphones around their neck, carrying a flat, wrapped package under their arm. ]

Hey. Boss? You got a moment?

[Alastor is in his office, working on some advertisements.]

Hm? Oh, yes my dear, please, do come in.

[Acht will get one of those Christmas chocolate boxes delivered to their door! Attached to it is a note.

"Happy holidays! -Mae"

[On the morning of Christmas, Acht will get a call from the hotel staff that they've got a package waiting for them and will bring it up to their suite right away! It's a two parter - a small but colorful gift bag with glittery tissue paper and a big, and actually kind of heavy, box that definitely has something sturdy inside of it.

The gift bag will include some top of the line headphones and a bag of cute sugar cookies Ochako made herself that are all music themed. She did have a bit of a hard time trying to find some good quality headphones - everyone in Heaven and Hell boasted theirs was the BEST, but she settled on these ones. Hopefully their suit Acht's needs, at least for personal use if not professional.

Now, the big gift is going to take a little bit to assemble, but it's clear right away what it is even with the parts not being combined from the get go. It's a paintball gun that comes with paintball capsules that can indeed be filled with Squid and Octoling ink! They sadly are not reusable capsules, considering they burst on impact, but there's a pretty good amount of them to start out with!! The design is sleek, has a good weight to it, and isn't clunky or hard to handle. Give it a spin sometime!!! Included in the box is a card that reads as follows:

Dear Acht,

Merry Christmas!! I'm your secret Santa!! I really hope you like the gifts I found. I wasn't sure what brand or style of headphones I should have gotten, there are SO MANY out there, and I'm not too good with this stuff...but I really hope they work well for you!! There's a gift receipt in the bag if you need to return them, or they don't fit right - I won't be upset, you deserve to get something you can properly use, or like!

ALSO THAT GUN IS SO COOL. O:< I saw it in a shop in Hell and I've never heard of this kind of game before?! It sounds awesome!! You gotta tell me all about your battles and stuff with it whenever you use it, because I wanna try sometime too but it looks kinda scary... I hear those balls hurt when they hit, even through the outfits people wear that are padded and stuff. Though I guess I've endured way worse...

Anyway, I really hope you enjoy and have a wonderful Holiday this year and an even better one next!

Your friend this Holiday,
Uraraka Ochako]

Edited Date: 2024-12-22 06:06 pm (UTC)

[ Acht had just woken up when all this was delivered to their door. The headphones? Decent quality, yep. The cookies? Good for a snack, they might need one at work sometime.

The gun...

Wait, what is this thing? Some kinda charger? Kinda looks like one, except instead of an ink tank there are these capsules... If the letter's anything to go by, these things might pack more of a punch than even a normal ink weapon could. They'll just have to visit a firing range to test it out... ]

... Heh. I'll have to thank her next time I see her.

[ Between this and Al's weird demon warding pouch, Acht feels a little safer about dredging through Hell for the work commute. ]

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Honestly...that whole period of my life is kind of a haze.

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